The Swinging Lifestyle is as Multifaceted, as life and people are? Its Basic belief is that EVERYONE, has the right to live, love and enjoy themselves sexually, providing there is MUTUAL CONSENT between adults. This is the only area, that we all think alike!!! It is from this point on, we all differ about what the Swinging Lifestyle means to us and on what level, we choose to enjoy its benefits.
The Swinging Lifestyle has been in existence since time began. Because on its most basic level, the word “swinging” is only a board term meaning; the sharing of sexual pleasure with a person or persons we are not legally married to!!! In this context; most of the people in the world today, ARE swinging, whether they realize it or not!!!
The word “Swinging” derived from a Minister, who told his congregation, there were weird people who were swinging back and from bed to bed, in the same manner as Monkeys.
He seemed to think the people we spoke about were doing something new, different and weird but he was very wrong! Even in Jesus’ time it was the common and acceptable behavior for the wealthy and powerful to have many wives, concubines and slaves for their sexual pleasure!!!
Several women rulers availed themselves of their power also, by keeping an equal number of male slaves and consorts to satisfy their sexual needs and desires too. So, what is being considered as new and weird conduct in our present unenlightened sexually controlled and somewhat puritan thinking work has been considered normal and even acceptable conduct for many people civilization and religions since time began!!!
Most European & Asian countries: Africa, Iran, Egypt, China and Japan, were among those that have lived in this manner for centuries and some still are today! In France, during Queen Marie’s time; wild orgies were the norm, until she lost her head for being a taker instead of a giver!
Just maybe, that was then people started to assume that when you lost your head over sex it was dangerous or wrong!
In the recent past, we had many free thinkers, who were outspoken about their belief in their right to enjoy their sexuality. It is also well known that many of our world leaders — even those of the religious community have openly or secretly enjoyed their sexuality while trying to deny us the same rights and opportunities.
Old Ben Franklin was known to be a free thinker and nudist, while enjoying his sexuality in a manner we would call swinging. In fact, in today’s moral mudslinging climate, this brilliant statesman would not be allowed to hold any Government offices of positions he held. The moral majority today, would’ve hung him out to dry, just as they did Gary Hart!!! Today, people are only considered worthy of being world leaders if they can almost be considered for sainthood!!! In many cases it’s just that they have been sneaky or secretive enough to keep their true natures from being known.
Many of our movie stars are known for the sexual games they play, on and off screen, but most people just laugh and secretly envy them and talk badly about their neighbors if they are acting in a similar manner. It is normal for people to hate, deride, and judge anyone who has claimed their right to enjoy their sexuality in any manner they chose not to regardless of their own hidden desires!!!
In the last twenty years, some sexual rights were established in the courts of the land, proving the fact, a person’s sexuality should be their own business. But in the last five years, many of these same rights have received a battering by the vocal moral majority!!! It’s just not our business anymore, what we do in the privacy of our homes and bedrooms.
It has become the business of the local busybody and local governments organized religions and even your next door neighbor! The swinging lifestyle, as we know it today; has evolved, grown and changed during the last 60 years.
My parents were approached, when I was just a baby; to go to small home parties involving wife swapping with many of their neighbors and good friends. Most of them belonged to a very restrictive religion, which considered divorce a sin. So as a way to keep their vow, “Till death do us part” — they had decided to forget about “cleave unto each other only!!” Daddy naturally thought it was a great idea, but Mum objected and thought she had refused it for both of them, but Daddy claimed all his sexual rights without female.
For many years, the small Home Party situations was the only way people enjoyed swinging and they were restricted to couples only. This was a very much male-dominated society at that time, so it was definitely considered wife swapping. The attitude was: you can swing with my wife, if I can swing with yours’s? It’s a fact, many people & clubs haven’t progressed past this restrictive attitude today! Only for the last few years, have some clubs allowed Female or Male singles.
Organized On & Off Premise Swing Clubs have only come into being during the last 10-20 years, being modeled after Sandstone; an alternative lifestyle community in California The video they produced is still being rented in many local video stores, but this style setting club today, denies being part of the Swinging Community?!!
Today, on & off premise swing clubs are in most areas and countries of the world. The National Association, formed by Club Owners and Swing Magazine Publishers; host many widely varied functions: Conventions, Camp-outs, Cruises, Tours and Fun Weekends. These give everyone a chance to meet, exchange information a large number of subjects, especially any laws or medical concerns, which may affect people’s ability and right to enjoy their sexuality and the swinging lifestyle.
When a person attends these functions, they are able to learn that the majority of the participants are definitely not the dregs of the Universe, as the general public has been led to believe they are? In fact, just the opposite is true!!! The swinging lifestyle is only 10-20% as they’ve been depicted by the media, while the higher majority of them are highly intelligent, successful, community leaders and almost always the type of person you would love to have for a friend or neighbor. They’re the lovers of the universe, showing love, consideration and caring. They only want to be left alone to enjoy their friends, as they each desire!
They believe in their right to enjoy their sexuality, in private, in their own homes or organized swing clubs, plus grant their mates, other people, their sexual rights too. They learn how to show love to themselves and to their friends. They’re secure in their personal lives and in their sexuality, so they don’t feel the need to try to control anyone else’s lives or sexuality. They have a natural outlet for their sexual desires, with consenting adults, so are less likely to inflict them on their own children or any unwilling victims.
Committed couples, who have acknowledged themselves as swingers and have come into the swinging lifestyle, so they may act as each other’s best friend and continue to have totally truthful relationships, rather than lie to each other and have secret affairs. I personally consider it strange that the people in our world today are more understanding of secret affairs, than they are of an alternate lifestyle that advocates, demands and requires total truth!!!
Non-swingers are enjoying their sexuality, just as swingers are except they are lying to their mate’s about it and deliberately making their marriages unhappy to justify their actions and soothe their guilt! They haven’t learned that truth and honesty enables you to not suffer emotional and infidelity or guilt!!
Only about 10% of the people enjoying the swinging lifestyle have mentally and emotionally accepted their sexuality enough to be completely open about being involved in it! Some try to keep this fact secret due to the fears about how this knowledge would affect their lives, family relationships and careers. While other’s hide the truth because they refuse to admit even to themselves they are swingers. This is why many don’t attend organized clubs. They try to tell themselves that as long as they only to go small home parties with friends, they are not really swingers!!!
The couples who have been able to admit, they enjoy the swinging lifestyle, attend the major functions the lifestyle offers. This helps them to grow, learn and get past their fears, while the closet swinger has denied themselves this opportunity due to their fear.
If I could sum up, what the swinging lifestyle really is and isn’t, I would have to say that depends totally upon the needs, desired and attitudes of each individual who enters it. If you desire only more and better opportunities for sex that’s possible! If you are lonely and want good friends too, who will love and care about you while you enjoy going to dinner, dancing, camping and fishing, that is possible! If you want to meet people from all over the world to visit and visit you, that is possible!!! So just as in every other facet of life, swinging is what you make of it, nothing more, or nothing less.